• Sophie Ward

I'm Tired - The Code, Decoded.

I'm tired, a phrase used so many times by chronically ill people. At times it's our own automatic response. To us it explains why we aren't on top form without boring you with the in's and out's. 

What does 'I'm tired' really mean though?

1. I'm tired, today is not a good day. Please don't rely on me, question me, push me or expect too much. I am struggling just to get through the day. 

2. I'm tired, I am just about dealing with the crippling pain without collapsing infront of you or bursting into tears. 

3. I'm tired, I can't false smile and my brave face is slipping. Time to retreat. 

4. I'm tired, sadness and depression are riding high today. My mood may be unpredictable. 

5. I'm tired, I am not sleepy but truly physically and mentally exhausted. I couldn't just do with a 12 hour sleep. I could do with a new body and a year's worth of sleep.

6. I'm tired, simple tasks are zapping me today ( talking, walking, lifting etc ). 

7. I'm tired, I want to help you with your tasks but physically and mentally I am unable. 

8. I'm tired, I need some alone time. I am zapped from too much socialising or my pain has zapped me that a quiet day is what is needed so you don't burn out. 

9. I'm tired, too many things are going on that I can't explain or want to get into. 

10. I'm tired, I don't even know what or how I feel. 

11. I'm tired, I have hit my wall. I am zoning out. 

12. I'm tired, tired from fighting my own body. We don't ever get a day off or rest bite. 

13. I'm tired, I am mentally exhausted from trying to keep it 'together' on the surface.

14. I'm tired, mentally, physically and emotionally under a lot of strain.

15. I'm tired, the go to response when you can't explain how you feel.

16. I'm tired, I am drained but don't want to seem negative or weak so don't want to express the details. 

17. I'm tired, all my spoons are in the dishwasher.

18. I'm tired, I don't want to admit to you or myself how I am truly feeling. 

19. I'm tired, just sat here is causes me pain and is zapping me. If I named all my symptoms I would send you to sleep. The list is longer than your weekly shopping list.

20. I'm tired, it's the truth. I am. In so many ways. 

Such a simple response we so many hidden reasons.

I hope the above gives you an idea of some of the possibilities that someone who answers you with, 'I'm just tired', may really be going through, dealing with or fighting. 

It is best to accept their response but let them know you understand and know it runs deeper. This allows them to relax a bit more, possibly be more open and know you are understanding & supportive. Which means the world. We can't ask for more.

If we give you simple answers like,

'I'm tired.' 

'I'm having an off day.'

' I am fine.'

'I'm ok.'

'I am a little under the weather.'

Doesn't mean we don't trust you with a more detailed answer. We often don't understand ourselves how we feel or why. We also don't want to dampen the mood. 

That's why you showing your support and understanding means so much because we are trying to protect you too. We then know the bond we share is a two way road and we are on the same page. 

Comforting to us chronically ill. Who fight to be heard and understood.

So today,

Ladies and gentleman- 'I'm tired.' 

I have used all my spoons, wisely I hope focusing on my passions & work but also taking 'me' time. 

If there is one thing that comes from suffering from chronic illness is boy, you are forced to accept situtations you never would have wanted too, forced to take a step back when you want to power through and you are forced to recognise you limitations and stare them right in the face.

I do dearly hope you have enjoyed today's blog and have noticed a few website updates that hopefully you will like. 

Thank you for all your on going support. You really do keep me fighting and motivated to keep learning, spreading awareness and gaining knowledge.

Love and peace 



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