• Sophie Ward

Judgements and Comparisons.

We all worry about judgements and we automatically compare ourselves to others on a daily basis. 

Whether it is worries about friends or family judging you or comparing yourself to family members and friends it can really effect our mood. 

We are surrounded by social media drumming into us what we should look like, where we should be in our careers and how our life should be. We never get a break. 

This is a hard enough habit to break and get out of when you have the best bill of health. If you are suffering from chronic illness however it seems to be 1000 x's more challeneging. 

We watch friends and family succeed in the careers they have always dreamed of having. We see them enjoying the sun, travelling the world. Showing off their bodies and throwing themselves into amazing experiences.

We are always so pleased and proud of them. However it is also extremely natural for us to be envious of them. 

They get to live the life we wanted and dreamed about for ourselves.

Instead we watch time fly by, years go on, we age and we ride through the endless pain. Having to except bed days, movie days, working from home and mini events. 

We worry and know that we only get one life and a limited amount of time. 

When you have so many dreams and goals it is hard to accept the little things you are still able to do. 


As your loved ones plan travel trips of a lifetime you are planning your next treatment plan. 

We have to flip and unwrap these issues to try and see it in a better more positive way. 

Instead of always comparing ourselves to loved ones and the experiences / activities we can't do let's look at the things we can do. 

How would your loved ones deal with the situtation we are battling through & with?

Would they be able to still have the motivation and determination to work on projects from home?

Would they still have hope of finding a way to make themselves better?

Would they even get out of bed and face the day?

Would the keep a kind heart and be grateful for the little things?

Would they have the drive to research?

Would they paint on the false smile and rave face to try and be normal?

Would they have the heart to help and advise others?

We may not have the bodies, the careers, the experiences and goals we had planned for at this point in time. But, boy have we still gained so much. We have gained things in all areas that our loved ones may never get to experience.

We have met amazing, inspiring people who relate to us and our illness.

We have gained bucket loads of knowledge on subjects we would never have come across without our illness. 

We have gained strength, strength from the battles we have won and lost. So many would not have had the strength we have had. 

We have push ourselves and handled pain like nobody else would believe. They most likely wouldn't have handled it with the grace you have. 

You have helped and advised so many people. Something that means so much to me and something that people rarely do these days. Helping others seems to be a dying trait. As the world becomes ever-more selfish. 

Encouraged yourself to take up new hobbies and work. 

You have gained knowledge, lessons and experiences that money can't buy and traits that are rare these days.

You may not be following the crowd - but you never wanted to be a sheep, right? 

You will stand out and people will respect you far more. As you will show your fighter side and your kind heart. True inner beauty and motivation. Not just surface beauty and falseness. You dig deeper and you bring so much more to the world. 

Maybe not now and maybe the goals you once had aren't on the cards anymore but we should never discard the achievements we have achieved whilst battling through illness and what we go on to achieve. Nor should we stop dreaming and setting goals for the future.

We can't compare ourselves or allow judgements to get to us. Everyone is unique. People who judge you are silly and uneducated as they clearly don't understand, know of your hard work behind closed doors or know about your ill health. 

To judgements we must rise above them - smile and shake them off. 

Knowing too well if you passed them your pain with a simple hug they would not be able to stand infront of you as strong as you now stand infront of them! 

We have to make our own happiness - judgements and comparisons rain on happiness. 

Remember - you are a fighter and doing amazing. 

Work always on making the negatives into positives. 

Be grateful for every moment and every beautiful person who fights with you. 

You get so wrapped up in being envious of others you forget that large group of people who envy you- they envy you for all the amazing traits and skills displayed above. 

Keep that in mind and that alone will give you drive and fill you with positive vibes. 

Keep rocking being you! 

Nobody else can do 'you' better. 

Keep that in mind. You are special, you are unique and are irreplaceable. 

And loved by so many. 

Thank you for reading. 

Big Bank Holiday Hugs. 

I love this image - the girl washing away negativity and rising up from the water ( pain and diseases in this sense) that tried to drown her. She is so beautiful and rises stronger that ever. Face to the sun, soaking up the rewards of all her hard work and the battles she has been through. Happiness and strength her rewards. 



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