For many Monday's are the worst part of the worst day of the week, the whole week until the weekend. I remember back in my school days Monday was a day we never wanted to come. We would cling onto the weekend hoping for some sort of time travel machine. Now, not always I will admit but I try to have a positive mindset when it comes to Monday's. We can't freeze time, rewind or replay. My Grandad always told me, 'Don't worry about things you can't change.' I am a worrier. We all know that. I think illness has helped me overcome this 'trait a little and taught me that indeed m Grandad is correct. Worrying won't change how fate chooses to play out events. YES, along the way their will be choices and consequences we have to face but they would happen whether or not we stayed up all night over-thinking.
Yesterday morning, I didn't feel well at all and although I improved over the course of the day but still I felt from 'top form'. Normally, I would sit and worry endlessly, telling myself to get a grip and worrying that I wouldn't enjoy the day or the events I was attending. I always believed that every event or 'plan' I have, I have to be on top form to enjoy it and get the most out of every opportunity. Now, the dream would be to be on top-form but perfection is a myth it isn't reality. If everything went completely to plan we would never see how strong we can be or gain strength as we need to challenges to do so. Its far more important to focus on the positives rather than feed the negatives. We may not be wearing the outfit we wanted, we may only be able to hack an hour or so when the event is four hours, we may have to delay the event a day or a week , we may have to leave early, we may have to take walking aids when we had hoped to walk. Instead of seeing the situation with 'what if's' hanging over them and focusing on what we DIDN'T DO then we really aren't making the most of the opportunities.
We must realise that the little 'hang up's' we have really are little 'hang up's' in the grand scheme of things. We must celebrate the achievements and successes we do manage to achieve. I won't allow my illness to keep, taking, taking, taking. I am here, I work hard to be the BEST person I can be and every little victory is a great addition to my life.
The manic, fab week I enjoyed last week wouldn't have been what it was if I had of allowed my illness and fears take over me.
I would NOT have done the TV interviews, I wouldn't have done a heavy week at the Park Home show, I wouldn't have enjoy soccer aid as much as I did.
My fear of talking, being open and being on camera would have caused me to run like Gump away from the situation and really Gump is a perfect example how we must just shake off the negatives and when we do that we can achieve endless successes and experience life so much more. I have studied my leaders and public speakers. I have read about my idols, their fears, failures and insecurities and realised that it isn't about me. It is about helping others and making a difference that counts. That passion in turn is so rewarding that the overall experience and opportunity becomes priceless. The buzz of over-coming fears is also a massive reason to keep pushing myself. The more I face my fears the stronger I feel about dealing with my illness and taking on life. They are massive learning curbs and I can't tell you the difference it has made to me and my outlook on life.
Don't get me wrong! I have my days, the days I don't want to move and complain! I hate the world for my pain and want to escape, give up and throw the towel in. This is where we need the strength gained through our successes to carry on facing the fears, knowing that by doing so we can achieve more than we ever believed. I, as many sufferer's have been, in the situation when we have seen our lives flash in front of our eyes and questioned whether the end had come. I think through my experience of this I have realised how precious life is and my loved ones are. I am beginning to realise I am stronger than I first may have believed and CAN face my fears and come out the other side. Even if I don't come out the other side, I tried and that's a victory in itself.
This week is another busy one. Once again, I am attempting new challenges and facing new fears. Maybe I can be accused of living slightly dangerously and making reckless decisions at times but I really think my mindset and how I live life through learning from other sufferer's, history and my idols has made and shaped me into a much stronger and better person.
Maybe this week we can all set ourselves the challenge to face a fear and overcome something. Make sure you take the time to enjoy the celebration of the victories you achieve. Believe me, it will really add sparkle to your life.
Not all is lost when it comes to chronic illness. It is a pain in the backside and my GOD a hard path to walk down but we too, like anyone and everyone on this Earth can achieve, succeed and enjoy pleasures in life. Please share your achievement with me.
Tomorrow is the Government meeting, Mama and I will be up bright and breezy for a full day of serious talks on such a pressing issue so close to our hearts. I hope I have lots of positives to fill you in on. ROLL ON LONON.