My Ship May Have Some Leaks - But It Won't Sink.

July 20, 2017

Day four. 

 

'You can't cross an ocean - without losing sight of the war.'

 

Exhausted but still fighting. 

 

Wednesday was one of the hardest days I have faced. This whole week has been such a challenege. 

 

***

 

Today I was praying for a better day. Though I knew I needed to target sunflower oil as it's in SO many products - nuts, chips, crisp ( the list goes on.) So to make my life easier when eating out especially I wanted to test it and find an end point for my vaccine.

 

The symptoms were awful. 

I felt like my chest was caving in, horrendous headache, falling backwards - dizziness, and razor blades down my throat. 

 

Scary.

 

Trying to keep calm is so difficult and well emotions flowed.

I managed to keep myself in check emotionally pretty well today. Though I feel low and zapped. 

It's so hard. I can't really explain. You question everything.

 

What sins have I committed to deserve this pain ?

Who have I wronged?

Who have I hurt?

 

I guess it's just life though. 

I like to think that the toughest hero's are given the toughest battles to fight. 

 

That's what gives me motivation to breathe through the pain. 

 

We finally after 5 hours of constant injections found an end point for sunflower at 18. 

 

We then moved on to Almonds and Butternut squash - not reaching an end point for butternut squash by the end of the day. So I will continue on with that tomorrow.

 

***

 

My bloods came back this morning and due to my liver being inflamed due to all the viruses, infections & with the extra stress on the immune system with testing this week. It is struggling to flush out the baddies and toxins efficiently. 

 

I was concerned about this.

I didn't want my liver under excess stress  and then the toxins still be sitting in my organs because the liver can't flush them out.  Meaning my health wouldn't be able to improve as much. So asked if I can have the IV liver detoxes. 

 

My nutritionist & my consultant both agreed my decision and idea for this was the right way to go. So I will only be doing testing in the morning before being hooked up after lunch for my liver detox infusions.

 

My nutritionist has give me more med's to help my overall help. Magnesium, iron & b12. 

 

More pills.. 

It already takes me 30 minutes to take all the ones I already have. 

All fun and games - got to make light out of it all. 

 

***

 

I am so relieved it is nearly home time. 

 

It's been the hardest week. It is so hard at times to watch loved ones graduate & living life to the full, whilst you feel numb with pain. 

 

Numb. 

 

You want to be out there with them, cheering them on. Creating memories with them and living life for yourself.

 

When the pain levels are high it is so hard to keep motivated. 

 

I just have the think about my travel bucket list and the memories I want to make with friends and family.

 

I can't wait for my nearest and dearest to be able to come down and see the treatment set up for themselves and the beautiful people & nurses. Being the extra cheerleaders when I am going through the darkest times. 

 

***

 

People who make history don't have an easy road & I hope to leave my footprint on the world. 

 

So I hope I help, inspire & raise as much awareness as I possibly can. 

 

Keep strong warriors.

 

S

Xoxo

Trying to joke around ! Lighten the mood! 

 

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SOPHIE'S
COOKING TIPS

#1
Feeling sluggish and rubbish when you have woken up? Get boosting up on bananas the more the better - they will help settle your stomach, boosting digestion, they are a mood enhancer, they will give you the energy you need and keep you full. Buy my book for banana receipe ideas.
 
#2
Wake up every morning and ATLEAST have one glass of lemon water before doing anything else! Ideally try to drink a litre of water. The lemon wakes up your digestive system ready for the day and has great cleansing properties.
 
#3
Check your dairy and meat intake - dairy can sit in your system for up to seven days unable to digest properly. Meaning other foods also get neglected and nurtients aren't absorbed properly and you feel extremely bloated. Go and smell your food bin, your stomach will be in that state. Rotting foods in your belly - hmm nice.
 
#4
DO NOT FEAR CARBS - THEY ARE NOT THE ENEMY! CARB UP!!
Bananas, Rice, Potatoes, Leafy Greens, Corn, Beans, Lentils etc PACK THEM IN GO MAD.
 
#5
NEVER COUNT CALORIES - NEVER RESTRICT!! These restriction 'starvation' diets who tell you to only eat 500 calories a day then have a treat day - where you binge out and eat WAY too much, is simply messing up your metabolism and on your binge days yours body stores all the fat meaning you gain weight because it knows it is going to go back into starvation mode and needs to hold onto every little thing it can. HELLO WEIGHT GAIN. 

Life is too short not to live it to the full, making yourself happy.

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