Two days of living ‘normally’ has taken its toll.
I am in agony - my joints are so bad, they have never been this bad. I am struggling with my hands, knees, wrists, ankles and toes. As well as getting new pains in my shoulders and elbows.
I can’t explain the pain - I just want to cut the parts of my body off.
Yesterday was a day I couldn’t do anything. I managed to get out of bed and that was a big accomplishment.
I feel so embarrassed. I tried so hard to be fun, jolly and full of life on Boxing Day to be the old Sophie. I don’t want people thinking I am boring or act like a 80 year old.
It’s fair to say 2 hours and I had burnt out.
I fought back tears on the way home.. embarrassed that my efforts had lasted only a short time and still weren’t good enough.
I felt like a waste of space and now I was paying for the backlash of my efforts and recklessness.
Eating dairy and getting an upset stomach, eating carbs and foods with refined sugar in them, being full of life & moving around so that my joints got angry and began flaring up.
Now I think how stupid but at the time you want to feel included and enjoy life. So the thought of paying the price later goes out the door.
And although I kept up with my Alpro yoghurts, my carbs and fats were WAY over.
Christmas Day and Boxing Day, I went 40-45g of carbs over and 13g of fats over. Whilst my protein was 20g under.
I guess it’s my own fault - they bacteria are having a party in my joints. I’ve just fed them what they have craved for weeks.
And due to my own stupidity it’s meant despite eating over my daily intake by 500-600 calories my weight stayed the same. None of the foods I fed myself has gone to me. Let’s face it, all the energy from those extra carbs haven’t made me swing from tree tops, I can hardly move. Lucky to have gotten up and gotten dressed.
I also had a temperature 36.4 on Boxing Day morning after being so naughty on Christmas Day. So my immune system has also being threatened by the obvious increase in energy the bacteria had been given.
I’ve been learning on my course today about vitamin C.. I have a large dose along with olive leaf extract everyday to help keep my immune system strong and it really does help me.
I am working so so hard to get to the bottom of my new problem.
Low red blood cells & platelet count.
These levels are important as they show how much oxygen your cells are receiving for repair & well to survive.
I don’t do failures - as you all know.
I have fought bloody hard to get my proteins up and strengthen my white blood cells.
Like me.. the Lyme want to survive too. I should have released that the road would never be easy.
As any human being in the world and as we have through evolution, we adapt to survive.
This is what the Borrelia is now doing.
Adapting - finding other ways to keep living.
At my expense.
Lyme Disease Bacterium Switches Out Iron For Maganese to Evade Immune System, study shows.
It is being discovered that Lyme bacterium is the only pathogen to be able to live without iron.
Lyme requires large amounts of managanse to make an important enzyme.
Lyme doesn’t have the genes to make iron-containing proteins.
This new talent of not requiring iron, allows the pathogen to evade the immune system, which act against foreign invaders by starving them of iron.
They need the manganese to use to create defensive proteins that help protect them against the immune system.
Normally, when we become infected with pathogens the body has a natural immunological response. The liver produces hepidin, a hormone that inhibits iron from being absorbed in the gut and also prevents it from getting into the bloodstream.
We begin to feel terrible as the pathogens are starved of iron they need to grow and survive.
But the pathogen is eventually starved out.
Borrelia has no need for iron, and has evolved to evade that defense mechanism.
‘Metal trafficking’ is used by the Borrelia to manipulate metal ions for their biological purposes.
Experiments have revealed that Borrelia use next door neighbour metals -manganese to create enzymes. These include amino peptidase and an important enzyme called superoxide dismutase.
Superoxide dismutase protects the pathogens against the second defense mechanism that the body throws against them.
The body bombards the pathogens with superoxide radicals, highly reactive molecules that causes damage within the pathogens. Superoxide dismutase is like an antioxidant that neutralises the superoxide so that the pathogens can continue to grow.
Switching off the body’s response to ‘metals’ and minerals it does not need for this process- iron.
It’s important to rise the point that vitamin C combines with iron to create protien compounds so the body can absorb the two nutrients and use them to strengthen the bodies immune system. So not only does the bacteria know that iron is needed for oxygen to repair cells but that it’s especially needed to repair the body’s immune system - which it cannot allow to happen.
It is also a possible worry that I may also have been infected with Babesia - a co-infection of Lyme.
Babesia attacks red bloods cells, whilst the Lyme attacks the white.
Babesia is carried by ticks.
Symptoms are similar to Lyme. Complications include very low blood pressure, liver problems, anemia ( a break down of red blood cells) and kidney failure.
I have non-stop issues with my kidney infections and my liver is always at the high end of normal.
So this also could be a possiblity to answer the cause of my problems.
Starving the Lyme of glucose with my reduction of carbohydrates it is now having to focus of my vitamin and mineral sources to seek energy to reproduce.
Manganese as well as iron are ‘trace’ minerals as I am learning in my course. We don’t need a huge amount of them but they are essential for feeding the vitamins we absorbs to our organs and bloods and in order to create protein enzymes for repair.
I also need to becareful of mass activation syndrome - where the DNA of my cells have been changed so much that my intolerances could increase or get worse. Keeping ‘pushing’ it with these foods and chemicals could not just course heightened symtoms but an over-all blow out.
I always hope to be one step ahead of my Lyme but this seems very impossible.
I am uneducated and must learn on my journey - Lyme knows it’s stuff. It knows what it needs and it will do ANYTHING as will I to keep living.
The war never ends.
You may begin to celebrate on winning a battle but then you come up against the next bombardment in which you have to run over no-man’s land, praying to God you don’t get shot down or captured on you brave fight to reach enemy lines and face the enemy face to face.
It is also a good point to raise that Coxsackie virus does require iron to grow - and so will be using up any iron resources I have left.
Coxsackie causes upper respiratory problems as sore throats and runny nose. Which I have regularly.
I saw a quote just the other day, that said people suffer with Lyme disease spend 3 - 5 times more energy than the average person to carry out the simplest of tasks.
I can believe that.
My body doesn’t seem my own anymore.. and that’s difficult.
I have been in alien lands in life before and tried my best to adapt, make the best of the situation and learn.
But surroundings can change.. your body is essentially yours.
We all know we can change our bodies through diet and exercise. But - We can’t make ourselves not have a high temperature by doing one more session at the gym. We can’t change what the bacteria feed off, we can’t time the symptoms like you can time your runs. You are the alien ! You can’t opt to move home and all will be changed . I am quite good at adapting and coming to terms with things but when people preach out their bodies being their temple and they love, nourish and care for it.
What do you do when you body is a battle zone? Left out in no-man’s land, in the dark with no idea where the enemy lines have moved to or who the hell is on your side.
I spoke to my brother last night on the way home - he was questioning whether to go out and books festivals etc. I told him he must do whatever he wants because we never know what is around the corner. I so wished I travelled more before all this as when days go by I worry I’ll never get to explore the world 🌍 and enjoy the thrill of learning more. Such a hobby of mine I adored and it was a hobby I could enjoyed with my most loved - family.
We spoke to friends on Christmas Day evening about joint pain too. I said my worry is I am 24 in two weeks time - how the hell will I cope with this pain for another 60 years. When 24 hour days are a hell of a challenge. I don’t want to wish my life away but the days (like yesterday ) when my body had zero, zero energy and could barely move time goes on and on- so slowly.
Wanting to do so much more but simply can’t.
I had a lovely Christmas - and even though I am in a lot of pain, I enjoyed it in the best way possible and tried to live it for me.
For once I didn’t want the day to be take over or tailored around the constant battleS I just wanted, like I hope my birthday will be- a Sophie day.
I will have to see what New Year’s eve brings it depends on how I recover over the next few days.
Thank you for reading and I hope you all enjoyed a lovely Christmas!