We can't change the past so why do we dwell on it? It doesn't make sense for a lot of reasons, yet somehow we find ourselves caught in the unhealthy habit of over-thinking. Allow the negatives take over us and control our mindset.
Frankly and admittedly so I have wasted SO many years replaying the same things over and over. Wondering, what went wrong? How did that happen? Punishing myself over and over - for what? It wasn't solving any of my problems. Just feeding my unhappiness and highlighting the negatives so that they were like the sound on full blast in my mind.
2019, has been a difficult year. In so many ways. Yet, through all the storms and hardships there has been many great opportunities, memories made that I will forever cherish, new directions in life, new projects and ventures that without the storms I would never have been blessed with.
You can say I have become a little reckless in my mindset. No more waiting around. No more playing safe. No more running away from my dreams rather than chasing them. NO. My health and being poorly isn't ideal but it doesn't make me less of a person. It doesn't mean I don't deserve things. I WOKE up. I HAD to stop putting the blame on myself and punishing myself for things that have been out of control. I had to understand that my body is struggling and the bottom line is.. time is precious. If I don't ACT NOW, feed my own soul, create my own happiness, begin chasing dreams and achieving goals my time might run out and then what? A LIFE lost and only half lived.
Another important frame of mind I am trying to challenge is being a drain on people. That my health is a NOT A SELLING POINT. It is the like the VAT added to the price that is a shock & makes you place the item back on the shelf. I was always worried that my health made me boring, it was a huge issue and almost made me less of person. I am slowly but surely trying to teach myself ( with self-development) that although my health isn't ideal I do have a lot I can bring to the table. I shouldn't discredit that. Again, it is about highlighting and turning up the positives to dampen the noise from the negatives. By highlighting three strengths a day whether that is personality traits or skills. It is important to remind ourselves what we bring to the world. It gives us purpose. It gives up meaning to our days. That is truly important.
I am having fun documenting my own journey with self development. It is really giving me a buzz to see other people message me with their wins, their successes and achievements for the days, weeks and so on. You must understand how much this empowers me. You inspire me as much as I hope to empower you.
Although today has been hard with a very unsuccessful hospital appointment and here is me sitting here trying to fight back the tears. I am trying to keep positive. I have had some wins today. I have reworked my website (so please take a look around!) It has taken me a solid two days to do it all so I pleased that I have succeed and worked out how to solve all the errors. I have done some campagin work for the charity I support Invisiyouth. I have taken a branding course on Skillshare. I have found some STEALS for Valentine's weekend and Miami for half-term week ( don't worry I will be sharing, keep reading.) My social media posts have uplifted some of you & that means the world to me. I am looking into 2020, to make it as good as possible & ensure I am making plans to look forward to. In order, to keep me focused and positive. I have put together this blog post & I have my daily social posts for Facebook and Instagram to do yet. Although I feel I never do enough, I don't stop. I haven't sat around dwelling, I am not one to feed the negatives if I can help it. Who knows what the future holds heath wise. Don't get me wrong, I don't have my head in the clouds. I know things aren't rosy but for what I do have control over I vow to make the most of. Aiming to achieve my goals, make my dreams a reality and be the best person I can be.
That is all I can ever ask.
PARIS Valentines Trip
Thursday 13th Feb-Saturday 15th Feb, 2020
Holiday Inn Notre Dame, Roof Terrace. ****
Eiffel Tower Room with Queen Bed & tower view £413 based on 2 people, B&B
Thursday 13th Feb-Sunday 16th Feb,2020
Radisson Blu Hotel *****
3mins walk from the Cathedral.
Double Bed 2 Adults
3 nights £482, B&B
This is a special hotel, not just for it's central location but for the MASSIVE FISH TANK in the centre of the hotel!