I haven't written in a while.
Sometimes, I can't find the words or even decode the chaos in my mind. I know I show up every day, act strong, smile, laugh it all off.
I am like you, I have never been here before even. I am feeling the emotional weights we are all carrying around right now. I don't have all the answers but, you bet I wish I did.
Life is the toughest job any of us will EVER take on. We can't learn out of a textbook how to live. We learn on the job, always growing & always experiencing.
I feel so heavy, so confused, so lost by it all. How life again and again throws us off course. The bounce back, how many times can we do it?
The mystery.
Somehow, like the sun we always rise. It doesn't mean that everything is perfect or that we aren't going to make mistakes.
I am a perfectionist & I am so guilty of flying off the handle when things feel out of control. Everything has to have a meaning, I always want an answer and everything has to have a purpose. Life has other ideas. I am learning the hard way that we have to keep faith in fate. Keep learning & go with the flow.
I would love to heal the world, make everything right for everyone as well as myself. I try to heal & soothe hearts whilst mine is breaking inside. I try to make something of a life & a person that so often feels so alien to me. I could just give up, lie down & be quiet. It's not only easy to show up, speak up & rise even when you are beyond exhausted. There simply is something within me, that fights back.
I only hope I help people. I help soothe people, so all of this: the struggle, the story, the fight was worth something.
I try to refer back to Gary Vee, saying we have 1 in a 400 million chance of becoming a human being. Why aren't we making the most of it?
We all have our demons, our bad habits, our weakness, our struggles but kindness is free there is no excuse not to use it. We were granted the gift of life we have to make the most of it.
So, yes I am human, I am just like you. I have never been here before, either. I can't see mistakes as failures or my struggles as punishments. We are all learning every day.
I know all our minds are manic now, racing day and night but I hope this post brings you comfort that you are not alone. I also want you gain inspiration from this post too, that we are incredbily lucky & even on the down days we need to b grateful.
Let's keep rising,
Sophie xoxo
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